


Caution Side Effects May Include:

by Rocky



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Blood, Bro - Freeform, Dee - Freeform, Demons, Demonstuck, Dirk - Freeform, Gore, Heaven, Hell, Lucifer - Freeform, Stridercest - Freeform, Twin Striders, dave - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-02-02
Updated: 2014-02-02
Packaged: 2018-01-10 21:31:37
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,084
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1164757
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rocky/pseuds/Rocky
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Authors Note: This is From lots of Different View points since it is an rp.</p><p>Life in the Strider house hold was anything but calm. Dave and Dirk were the twin incubi from hell, Bro was just your average run of the mill evil demon who took pleasure in your pain and then, their was Dee the Famous douche bag Demon. Yeah Between these clowns and their satanic adventures you just don't know what might happen next! Every chapter comes with your own personal side effect ! Read at your own risk you have been warned!</p>
            </blockquote>





	Caution Side Effects May Include:

**Author's Note:**

> The First Side Effect : Casually Burning plants

TT: Dirks back slammed into the wall nearest the sofa, cracking the plaster in the process. He was going to fucking make Dave pay. This wasn't about who had control of the remote any more. Oh no. This was about pride. And he'd sooner be further damned than allow for his younger twin brother to make a mockery of him. Dirk snarled and smacked his fist into Dave’s face, the pair of them toppling over onto the couch with the force only two juvenile demons could exert. To his horror there came a sickening snap from underneath their panting bodies. They had split Dee’s black leather Italian sofa in two.

TG: The smirk never left Daves smug face; he just about laughed…no no that was a laugh alright. “Good job Bro you broke Dee’s couch.” Snarky and calm Dave held on to the fists near his face. So far all Dave had done was keeping up defense and that was all he needed to do to get his twin going. Casual, suave, relaxed, just like Dee. “What you gonna do now?” It was on, he was going to win this all he had to do was get his feet up and push. And he watched as his twin flew up over him crashing down hard enough to knock over the high class flat screen and he heard static then nothing. Oops.

BRO: From his room, Bro was awoken by a loud ruckus. He grimaced, opening one orange eye with a scowl. What was the noise and why had it dared to wake him up after a long night of weeding out hunters? He snarled, sitting up from his bed, hair a mess from sleep. Whoever had ruined his beauty sleep was in deep shit. Snagging his hat and shades, Bro made his way out of his room, following the sound of breaking. "Son of a- YOU SHITS BETTER NOT BE RUINING MY CRAP!”

TT: "Yeah-" Dirk grunted as he rose sparks shooting off from the television set behind him and igniting the untended house-plant next to it. “Well just look what you fucking did. You think he's going to be mad about the couch? Just wait till he sees what YOU did to his flat screen baby!" Dirk wiped the back of his hand across his bloody lip, the sight of his own spilled blood causing his anger to intensify. Dirk threw aside his shades and dove back into the fray with unrelenting fury. His hand found its way into Dave’s gut and he followed through with a bellowing punch.

Dee: Dee was walking up the stairs to the apartment grabbing his keys. He heard loud bangs and things breaking. His eyes narrowed behind his shades "Son of a bitch" he hurried up and opened the door. He spotted the couch then his eyes darted to the TV and then the plant that was casually burning. He took a deep breath feeling the red in his eyes burn with anger. "I am going to count to three and both of you better stand up and stop." he was beyond mad and his voice reflected it. He was not fucking around oh he was going to punish these two.

TG: He was shrugging ready to let it go but when he felt the punch to his gut all treaties were gone. Coughing and stepping back trying to get out of Dirk reach so he could respond, eventually he clenched his teeth and reared up with a punch ready if his head didn’t hit first. It hadn’t so the punch was next, that missed so he used the other hand to slap across his face. It wasn’t very manly but it would stun him. “Dirk started it!” He claimed making sure he was out of reach from all three older striders, sometimes it was hard being the youngest. Yeah…he took that back it wasn’t at all.

TT: Dirk side glanced to his younger sibling with indignation. As he pulled his torso up from the rubble of the sibling rivalry fuelled chaos he pressed his hand to the red imprint Dave had struck against his face. They were fucked. His fault or not, Dave would be getting the brunt of the blow as much as he would. He was sure of it. He faced Dee, standing as straight as he could to portray utmost respect in the dire situation. "I did not start it. He is young and immature and his obstinate ways are the reason the living room is in shambles. Seriously. I hardly even touched him. "

BRO: Bro rounded the corner, stopping dead in tracks at the sight of the living room. Wrecked could never began to cover the state it was in, the couch was in two, the TV was sparking and shattered, and the plant was on fire. He stared at the scene with growing anger. Those little shits, did they think this crap was easy to come buy?! That TV was the best on the market and they had destroyed it with such little care! Snarling angrily, he advanced on both the boys, grabbing them both roughly by the shoulders. "I don't give a shit WHO started it, both your asses are getting beat- and Dee for the love of hell will you put out the damn plant!"

TG: “By three fucking minutes, you have no right to call me immature. You were watching a TV show for girls!” He pointed stepping closer to Dirk shaking off Bro’s hand ready to add a back hand to that slap. He shoved his finger in his chest standing just as tall. “Shambles, my fucking ass.” He stepped forward again shoving his finger in his chest again poking him. “You threw the first punch, I only fought back once, and you landed in the Tv.” His shades had long been knocked off in the first toss and he was glaring dagger. Like hell he was going to let his Twin throw him under the bus.

Dee: Dee looked at Bro "I handle the punishment you put out the fucking plant. I paid for this shit! You think Italian sofas just fall out the sky! I had that hand made by an Italian man who had seven kids! That was very expensive you little shits and my TV and my fucking plant! I love that plant." he was speaking loudly. He put his things down and looked at Dirk and Dave. "Now stop fighting and stand still or I will make your punishment twenty times worse than it fucking it is."

BRO: Bro shoved Dirk towards the eldest Strider, attending to the plant. Poor thing hadn't seen it coming. With a wave of his hand, Bro killed the fire, leaving behind only the ruined weed. There was no way in hell that thing was going to make it. Tutting, he turned back to watch the other three, curious how Dee would handle them. "What do you want me to do with all this ruined shit. Can't even resell it they wrecked it so bad."

TT: Dirks head was addled with being tugged around by Bro. He still had a venomous look in his eye pointed for Dave- and he swore to himself if Dave tried to poke him with that finger one more fucking time he was going to bite it off and stick it up his fucking cock. Of course he had enough sense to internalize his anger in the presence of the now furious Dee. Muttering. “This is why we can't have nice things, Dave.” As he resumed his near military stance of remaining still.

TG: If it was Dirk the one on the frenzy before it was Dave now. He watched him reading his eyes. He said nothing; he had nothing to spit back. He knew how angry Dee could get but it was Bro he truly feared out of both. Though right now he was in tunnel vision and all he saw was Dirk, and how he was going to do anything he could to bug him. So he did was every good level headed sibling would do and put his finger just inches from him and had a full on cow boy stair down. He knew Dirk had a thing about touching, but he wasn’t touching him.

Dee: "Dave don’t you fucking dare" He was not going to let them play the 'I am not touching' Game. He was thinking to so he was mulling over punishments in his head. He had many ideas in his head but he wanted one that would really teach them a fucking lesson. Dee was cruel in his punishments if anything.

BRO: Bro took this moment to step over to Dave, forcing his hand down to the boys side, leaning down to snarl warningly in Dave's ear. "Quiet acting like a spoiled child."

TT: Dirks jaw clenched when the finger had come close to him. He was nearly screaming internally. How dare Dave try and make things worse for them. And Dave thought HE had started it. He would pay. Yes. Dave would fucking pay. He would find some way to make a punishment within a punishment for him. He wasn't about to break his stair with Dave either.

TG: He didn’t resist the hand being pushed down and it only made him glare harder at Dirk. He refused to break the stair, the everyday living was done with, a deep growl from his chest started up the moment he hear the snarl. Things were going to go down. He bared his teeth the hairs on the back of his neck prickled. Twisting his arm trying to smoothly get out of Bro’s hold. His eyes bright, almost if they were glowing, that snarl had set off instinct and that’s how things were going to end.

Dee: Dee Growled in response but moved around the two warning Dirk not to start back. Lifting the TV he sighed. “My baby. You were once majestic a pristine. “He turned looking at Dave who was still growling and hissing at his twin. “Beat him I will handle dirks punishment in just a second."

BRO: He nodded, understanding the order and wasted no time slamming his fist into Dave’s face. The blow was meant to stun, giving Bro enough time to slam the youngest Strider into the ground, cracking it under the pressure. He snarled down at the red eyed demon, ramming his fist into the Dave’s face, over and over again; not giving the youngest time to fight back. Bro was ruthless when it came to punishment. He grinned while he assaulted Dave, orange eyes shining behind their shades. "Little. Shit. Cock ass punk!"

TT: Dirk jumped at the violent assault, his eyes widened to cartoonish measures. He swore he felt his stomach drop out from his body. He should have really been more pleased to watch Dave getting the ever-loving shit punched out of him but he could not find reason to be jovial when He knew Dee was just as capable of causing damage to such a harsh and nearly uncalled for extent. He swallowed heavily, watching his twin twitch and struggle for a brief moment before turning back to Dee. Horrified. The anger had been drained right from his pouty little face.

TG: He felt his face hit the ground and whimpers came from him turning his face feeling the blows land on the side of his head blindly fighting back not hitting and feeling the world move to slow. Hissing, growling, and cries of apologies came from him still clawing at the fists. If it were any other place but the face he would have been turned on, since his already riled up state but it seemed any pain to his face was the only thing that didn’t turn him on. Eventually he dug his hands well enough into his hand than he was jerked up when he pulled away and he latched his teeth into the back of Bro’s hand. This was only going to make it worse but he couldn’t think. Tear and blood covered his face and he growled holding as tight as he could to the hand in hopes to make it stop.

Dee: Dee disposed of the television and stood behind dirk. He knew one thing that was worse than physical abuse it was degrading him. Dee hummed in his ear bending over slightly. He pinched dirks jaw and pulled a gun out pushing it in dirks mouth. "This has a special bullet in it that will kill you dirk. I am tired of this fucking shit. You need to behave or die. Now I am going to ask you a question get it wrong I will pull this fucking trigger ok."

BRO: He hissed when the fangs sunk into his glove covered hands, biting through the leather and into his skin. Snarling, Bro yanked his hand away, inspecting the damage. These were his favorite fingerless gloves. "Not content ruining Dee's shit now you gotta wreck my gloves?" Bro grabbed Dave by the hair, yanking him up to eye level. "I will make you burn kid. Respect your beaters. BEG for me not to fucking kill you, because right now, I don't see a fucking reason to keep you around!"

TT: Dirk nearly aged as the deadly metal wedged its way past his front teeth and pressed to the back of his throat. His eyes screamed to plead with the elder for the sake of his life. He kind of liked life in comparison to what death meant. He stood as still as a statue, managing to mouth out a distorted “Yes" around the metal that pressed down his tongue. He wouldn’t be able to answer any complicated questions with such an obvious disadvantage, and the irony of the situation persisted in that he was sweating bullets.

TG: Dave held on to the hand that clutched his hair, he cried. “I’m sorry, please. Family, were family. Stop” He kicked at the ground trying to get out of his grasp. “Dirk! Stop it, help me. Dee, make him stop I-I’m sorry.” He couldn’t see behind him and he was in too much of a shock to listen or be in tune with his brother. He cried harder, anyone else he would be laughing at but it was Bro who was holding him, over powering him. “I’ll be good. It was me, I’m sorry I’ll replace it.”

Dee: Dee rubbed his cheek "one blink for yes two for no. Now I want you to tell me did you start the fight and I know who did so if you lie I will shoot you." He smiled at him it was a full on grin not a cheeky smirk or a smug one it was a grin. The sight of Dee would send shivers down any sensible demon or human spine. He sounded cold and ruthless.

BRO: "Humph." Bro released his hold on the little Strider, taking the boys bruised face in his hand and wiping the tears away with a scowl. Maybe now the brat would listen and stop being such an egotistical little prick. "Damn straight you're gonna replace this- the TV, the couch, the plant- MY GLOVES. Yah got that?"

TT: Dirk wondered if that was some kind of trick question. In his panicked mindset he racketed the answer back and forth in his head. Dave had refused to hand over the remote, thereby challenging Dirks dominance. Yet at the same time it had been Dirk who'd dealt the very first blow against Dave. His eyes darted to the damage for an answer. He blinked once.

TG: He nodded trying to sniff in finding it to be rather difficult but whimpered pressing into the hands.”Yes, Bro were you really going to kill me?” He did his best not to start crying again. All he wanted to do right now was to curl in the bigger Strider’s chest and hide. Even though it was him who made him cry in the first place.

Dee: Dee nodded and pulled the gun out of dirks mouth. He then gave him a hard thwap to the head with his hand. "Ok then next time you do this shit you have bro deal the punishment or worse." he patted dirks head looking at Dave he felt a little pang but then he remembered the seven kids who helped make his nice couch.

BRO: He chuckled, gently stroking the top of Dave's head with an almost affectionate smile. "Nah... I wouldn't kill family. Might maim ya a bit." Bro gave the young demon a kiss on his battered face before pulling Dave to his feet. "Common, up you goes."

TT: Dirk winds down severely after he'd been pulled out of the line of fire and busies himself by going to get the broom in order to clean up the mess without being asked. He would make his amends with his twin once they were in private. He kept his head down as he worked around the three others. Not wanting to seem like he was challenging them further.

TG: He flinched at the kiss but purred and almost chirped back. He would have to remember that next time he threatened death, though maiming wasn’t any better. After he was pulled up and he tried wiping away the blood but it caused him to flinch. He whined again wanting attention now. He turned to Dee with a sniff and put his head down and wandered over to him. “Sorry Dee.” He flicked his eyes up pathetic face still covered in blood.

Dee: He looked down a bit skeptical but nodded. "It’s ok" he kissed Dave’s forehead "now help your brother clean the fucking mess you made." it was softer than before. He felt the boys had understood. He looked at Bro thinking.

BRO: Bro peered at Dee over his glasses, smirking at him as he took a seat on a not ruined piece of furniture. "How much was all this anyways? 20 k? 60 k?" Bro knew Dee loved to splurge on expensive items, something the second eldest did not see eye to eye with him on. A waste of good income.

TT: Glances back at Bro. Fuck. Why was half of their family always so determined to make things worse than they already were? He thanked himself for being the only sensible strider and unplugged the TV from the wall before it could start another fire.

TG: Dave flinched again. It hurt; Bro really did a number on his face. He dropped his head and went over to help Dirk and started picking up the bits of plastic that fell off the TV and dry wall they had done more than just break shit they had tossed each other into walls bringing some down with them. He flicked his swelling eyes to his twin; he was shaking and breathing heavy. “You look like shit.” He teased but it was friendly.

TT: Dirk sighed heavily withholding the urge to coddle Dave. He hadn't gotten the worst of it. True he could have died and his jeans were a little tight but things could have been worse. He patted his brother gently on the back and offered a fleeting smile in response. He spoke softly. “You always look like shit. Go get your shades."

Dee: Dee felt his eye twitched "Well I bring in the fucking money. I can buy what I like at least I don’t look like I was dragged off the street. Boys" he was going to piss bro off. "You don’t have to pay me back or replace the broken items." He knew it would irk him. He didn’t like that bro tried to tell him what he could and couldn’t spend money on.

BRO: He growled at the eldest demon, pushing himself up and out of the chair with one swift movement. "No, Dave is going to pay you back for all the shit he broke, otherwise he isn't going to learn and this SHIT will just happen again." Bro had always blamed Dave's lack of obedience on Dee, going on and on about how he never pushed the boy enough, that he spoiled the runt. "And at least I don't look like some Wall Street bitch."

Dee: He growled getting in the others face "As the oldest and the alpha I said he won’t pay it back my fucking choice. Really some Wall Street bitch I will have you know my suits are fucking fine. I know you splurge on stupid shit all the fucking time and really cheery bombs in my fucking ice dispenser who is the ridiculous one here"

BRO: Bro took a step closer to Dee, meeting his gaze with an angry scowl. "You're suits are cheap like you- and fuck you, cherry bombs are funny and ironic as hell."

TG: Dave smirked swatting his hand away “Blow me” he joked looking over at the other two. Scooting closer to Dirk he almost pressed behind him. He knew he was spoiled and babied, even thought he was only the youngest by three minutes he was still the youngest. It seemed Bro was the only one who didn’t give in to anything he wanted with just some puppy eyes. If his face wasn’t so bruised he would have slapped a hand over his mouth in a series of ‘oh snaps son’.

TT: Dirk backed away slowly from the oncoming brawl, finding portions of their personalities reflected in the heat of their elder’s example. He stood tall and brandished his broom like a weapon in front of Dave. Bro should really have gotten to healing Dave already. The swelling was starting to blotch his more delicate features up to an unattractive level and that would just not do. The middle child cleared his throat and attempted to be heard over the arguing. " Y'know I don't think your bickering is setting a good example."

Dee: "Ironic? Nothing about you is 'Ironic'." He made air quotes "Your shades are stupid and outdated and lil cal is a block of termite infested wood and those smuppets are cheap pieces of trash, not me. You disease riddled fucking loser." Crossing his arms his face never flinched from the stoic expression. "At least I know how to parent them, unlike some lazy fuck who is up all night messing with hunter rather than here raising the boys."

BRO: "Oh and your movies are the talk of the town, their cheap, uncreative, dull, and over colored beyond compare." He sneered at the elder, reaching out to flick his Ben Stiller shades. "Not to mention, shitty actors. Seriously, I have seen better acting in Twilight then your flicks." Bro paused his rant when Dee brought up the boys. Growling viciously, he snagged the eldest by the front of his Italian suit; yanking him forward to hiss in Dee's ear so only the oldest demon could hear. "You EVER talk shit about how I raise them while you're out all night and day making crappy films... I won’t hesitate to kill you."

TG: Dave let out a breath of oh shits and his face was really starting hurt so he would rather the two set good examples put their dicks back in their pants and fix his face. “Dirk.” He whimpered letting his eyes swell shut and he hid in his face in Dirks shoulder. “My face hurts”

Dee: "they are supposed to be shitty that is the irony maybe you would get that if you knew what irony really was." He pushed Bro off "Now excuse me I am going to go fix Dave like the responsible guardian I should, freeloader."

TT: "I know. Just breathe through your mouth. You'll be ok." Dirk muttered. His hands closed white knuckled on the broom stick. He didn't want to be there in the middle of that tense room having to put himself between the firefight and his whimpering brat brother. He just wanted to go to his room and barricaded himself inside.

BRO: Bro snarled warningly but dropped it when he heard Dave’s whimper. Yeah, he should have healed the brat awhile ago, wasn't his fault that Dee had distracted him. He would have healed Dave eventually... Cursing, Bro left the room, heading into the kitchen to grab a bite to eat, anything to drain his rage.

 

**Author's Note:**

> Any one who can work Ao3 and wants to be my editor and help me give this some color let me know in the comments.


End file.
